Undressing In front of strangers?

I was eleven years old the first time I flew on an airplane. It was June 1973. My sisters and I flew by ourselves from Indiana to Texas to spend the summer with our cousins. Mom dressed the 3 of us in matching dresses for the trip – red polka dotted fabric - we were so cute! Getting on the plane was only a concern because we were so young (I was 11, Ginger was 8 and Stef was 2 ½ years old) and we were flying without parents. Mom was able to take us all the way to our seats on the plane to make sure we got where we needed to be. I don’t remember security being a big ordeal.  

Airline travel is so much different now. Security is an incredible obstacle course and getting through it can be exhausting. Part of this has to do with how much “stuff” you bring with you and how well dressed you are. Technically, you are allowed to bring a carry-on bag and a personal item. Usually, I bring a backpack (my purse inside it) and a camera bag. Once you check your bags, the next step is to get into an incredibly long line at security. The TSA agents have apparently been told to ‘chat up’ the travellers because now they try to make small talk complete with witty repartee about where you are flying to as they check your credentials. That’s fine, but then comes the fun part.

You must undress right there in front of fellow travellers and TSA agents. I’m not talking about getting naked, but what you have to submit to these days to get on a plane is humbling and certainly can take you out of your comfort zone.

Take off your shoes. A crazy guy once smuggled a bomb onto a plane in his shoe. Thankfully, he was unsuccessful detonating it, but now everyone’s shoes have to be especially screened. Thanks a lot, Crazy Guy! Your best bet here is to wear slip-ons of some sort. I am always surprised when I see a woman with strappy stiletto-heeled sandals trying to balance on one foot while attempting to unbuckle the other shoe. My advice – make sure you don’t have holes in your socks and wear the loafers. It will definitely save you some time.

Next, take off your jacket and/or sweater. I guess you might be able to conceal something underneath your jacket that you aren’t supposed to bring on a plane. The only thing that I am trying to hide is how overweight I am.

Now, remove your belt, watch and heavy jewelry that might set off the metal detector. If you have brought your laptop with you, you must also undress it and take it out of its case. Now you may proceed through the metal detector without making the machine go off.

Many airports now have the special body scanning machines that you must step into while it scans you for contraband. You step into it in your socks, raise your hands over your head and the scanner goes around your body so that the TSA agents can see what your birthday suit looks like. Sometimes even the x-ray isn’t enough to guarantee that a person is safe to get on a plane so he might need to be patted down. I have been though all of this on several occasions and I must tell you that it’s quite degrading.

Once you have been cleared and deemed safe to travel, you have to hurry to the other side of the conveyor belt to collect all your belongings and get dressed as people behind you wait for you to get out of the way. Cheese and rice, what an ordeal.

I only fly for pleasure – never on business, so I will go through whatever processes necessary to get me to the next family reunion, wedding, graduation or vacation. I do understand the rationale behind all the security precautions – the world is a different place than it was when I flew with my little sisters in our matching dresses without our parents. I understand that it’s the price we have to pay to make sure that we are safe. I only wish that I didn’t feel a bit violated every time I leave my little corner of the world.